definitely, definitely crazy
by ThorMongoose
Summary: You watch movies, TV series, what have you, about a person getting caught up in something and through that they learn and grow as a person, come out of it stronger. Sometimes, in those other circumstances they don't grow at all but it is the other that they help to grow. Or maybe, you'll live and never find out, only in that last moment will it hit you. ((RE-EDITED))
1. Chapter 1

Lifting heavy eyelids I stare hazily up at blurry surroundings. Waiting for the grogginess to wear off. The ceiling slowly comes into focus. This is the problem with a modern designed condo's, I is too simple; there isn't that warm, homey feeling you're supposed to feel when living alone. I need to redecorate this place, possibly hire an interior decorator or something. Stretching one last time, I sit up and sway my legs off the side of the bed. The cool air hits my skin immediately. A tired groan escapes me.

"Forgot to put the heat on last night again, I see." Looking over, my eyes settle on the woman leaning in the doorway of my bedroom doorway sipping on her cup of Earl Grey tea. Her waist-long, pin-straight red hair is pulled to rest over her right shoulder. She crossed one arm across the waist of her white button up work shirt that was paired with a black pencil skirt that ended mid-thigh. She wore black tights, and as my eyes traveled, they led to 3-inch, black heels. "I've told you before, but you don't listen. Big surprise there," she says as she takes another sip of her tea.

"Well good morning to you too," I grumble out as I stand up heading toward the kitchen.

"Maybe, if you wore more than your boxers to bed during the winter, you'd be warmer," she says to me as I make my way past her into the kitchen where the beeping of the coffee maker reminds me that, yes, there is a heaven. After pouring myself a mug-adding enough cream and probably one too many sugars-I walk along the icy tiled hallway and plop down on the inviting couch. Settling myself in place, I bring the cup up to my lips to take a sip of the warm beverage. The sweet coffee fills my mouth and the hot beverage begins to warm up my body from the cold January weather.

"I wish we could get some fog or at least some rain, this cloudless weather and icy wind is such a bother," I mumble to myself as I continue to look out the large glass window that shows a breathtaking view of the park from the balcony. It's been a cloudless sky for the last month or so. While taking intermittent sips of my coffee I continue to let my mind wander. With the sun not blocked behind thick clouds, it's warm, but the icy breeze is incredibly unpleasant. Gazing out I get lost in the peacefulness of the view.

"You really oughta do something productive on your days off. You're not going to accomplish anything by shlumping about the house." I turn my attention from the view to send a glare to the person lounging in the chair across the wide living room, "that glare doesn't scare me whatsoever" she says with a smirk as she takes another sip of her tea.

"Jesus, at least let the coffee get in my system Kyu, I don't have the energy to deal with your lovely pessimistic attitude right now, not when it's so early," I groan as I run my hand through my unruly blonde bedhead.

"It's 7:30," she says, as if that should be a reason in itself. Setting my coffee mug on the dark mahogany table I let my head fall back and I stare at the soft grey ceiling.

"I swear," I grumble as I get my coffee of the table and put my head in my hands, "so, whats next week looking like?"

"You're free until Sunday. All of next week is piled up for you at the corp. Monday on there are final plans that need to you to sign off on. Plus your father needs you in on a meeting on Friday for company negotiations with a merger, then Saturday in the fundraiser."

"Suit or Tux."

"Tux. I have you in for a fitting Thursday afternoon after your 5:30 meeting with the developers. "

"Roger that. Thank you Kyu." Sitting up from the couch, I pick up my mug and head back into my bedroom to get ready for the my coffee on one of the tables I open my walk in closet to throw together an outfit to brace the cold. The sound of the front door opening and shutting.

Kyu has been my personal assistant since I first started working at my father's company.. Full name, Kyūbi Ōtsutsuki. She's part from Japan and worked for one of the companies that we merged with. My father assigned her to me. There was quite a rough path the first few months, but after a while we became really close, kind of like the older sister I never had. And she's been with me since then and at my request, not with me everywhere. I pull out a pair of loose-ish black jeans, white short sleeve and a soft grey sweater with beige elbow patches. I might look for a scarf that matches when I get out of my shower. With all of the clothes thrown onto my bed, I walk over into my attached bathroom. Leaving the door open is never an issue, being I live alone and don't have friends that visit. I moved out and my dad got me this place as I started to work for the company. It gets lonely from time to time but, all in all, I've gotten used to it. My father always worked when I was younger. So it was just my mother I, who is currently away. My dad started a company with his friend from college Kakashi Hatake, and became quite successful with it. Climbing to almost the top of the charts of successful companies. I have money in a trust for me to live on my own with, plus money from the company that continues to refill it. Long story short, I'm pretty loaded. But that doesn't stop me from from working hard. Not letting the money and fame get to my head. Helps when I have such amazing parents. I still see my dad every once in a while. But working the company puts a strain on his schedule, so I don't get to see him quite so often, same with mom.

After taking a nice, long, hot shower to wash away the tiredness of the morning, I brush my teeth, blow dry my hair, and get dressed. I finish off my coffee and sit on the end of my bed. I gaze out the huge plate glass window that overviews the park and part of the city.

"I'm going to take a walk. Haven't properly explored the area." I decide as I get up from the bed, get dressed and walk back through the living room, drop the empty coffee mug in the kitchen sink and head over to the hallway before the frontdoor. I slip on some brown leather laceup boots and shrug on a thick forest green jacket before picking up my brown messenger bag and slinging it over my shoulder. I pick my keys up from the hook by the door, check to make sure my phone and wallet are on me, "check," I head out, lock up, and walk down the pathway alongside my garage. Pulling out my earphones, I plug them into my phone and play some music to distract myself from my thoughts as I make my way into crowded downtown. Putting my playlist on shuffle 'Creep in a T-Shirt' by Portugal. The Man pumps into my ears.

Tucking my blue crystal necklace under my sweater I make my way down the crowded sidewalk. When you live in a crowded area of a city you pass a variety of people. From people in business suits heading to their big board meetings to errand employees speeding in and out of the dense crowd with messenger bags jammed full of files and paper work, poor kids. Students running to catch buses and trains, joggers, dog walkers. The city is buzzing with life and movement.

The music drowns out the cars, commotion, constructions, and conversations. Noise pollution.

The extreme number of people in such close proximity to me is starting to make me uneasy. Why did I choose to live in a highly populated city? It's where I grew up with my parents.

To evade the masses of people pummeling me as I try to walk, I cut down a small street and just walk and walk.

'Hmm, never been down here before' I pass by small shops. Some antique shops, some clothing shops, etc. 'strange how you can live in a city for all your life and have not been everywhere in it. This just shows I should walk around a bit more', after passing a few places I come across a book store. From the look of it it's been here a long time. Walking inside, there is a new additions shelf along with the most popular sales. Recognizing a few titles, but non of interest I continue my way in. It's an ornate little book store, the genres are in different corners of the shop with aisles holding them alphabetically. Striding my way from section to section, nothing so far catches my interest. Too preoccupied with looking through the fictional books, I do not register the person making their way down the aisle in my direction.

"Can I help you find anything today sir?" The figure says, successfully catching my attention. Turning around I register that it is a kid. He looks a bit younger than myself. He stares at me with a bored like expression that suddenly changes into surprise. He's cute.

"No, thank you though. I'm just browsing through," I say as I give him a sincere smile. He fidgets a bit with the sleeves of his black sweater and brushes his hand through his bangs that are covering most of his eyes. They're very dark.

"Ok," he looks back up to meet my eyes, with the help of the lights in the aisle I'm able to tell that they are a shade of very dark brown. "If you need anything, I'll..um..be at the counter up front or walking around putting things away."

I give a small chuckle "Ok, thank you," I say with another smile. He looks at me again for a minute. As he looks away, a small blush appears on his cheeks. He walks back to the counter, taking one last look over his shoulder as he continues on his way out of sight. I chuckle a bit to myself, as I mull over what happened whilst looking for anything that catches my eye. Nothing so far. I make my way down a few more aisles, trying to get a closer range of vision on the occupant at the counter. He looks to be around the age of 18 or 19, maybe working here as a part time to pay for school or just for some extra cash.

'So, it's come to ogling teenagers now', Christ. 'He's cute, you haven't given anyone a second glance in long time'. Sighing, I turn my attention back to the the books in front of me. While looking about through the aisles of novels, biographies, autobiographies, and mystery novels, every once in a while I would sense a presence. Looking over my shoulder every once in a while, I'd catch a glimpse of swift movement at the end of the walkway. Chuckling and brushing it off, I continue on with my business. Nothing today I guess, not too much of loss. Making my way up to the front of the store to the exit, out of the corner of my eye, I can see the kid stumble to hide the fact that he wasn't watching me.

"Did you find anything today, sir?" he says politely as I make my way to the front.

"Nothing of interest," he gives me a smile that shows a little disappointment. He probably won't run into me again. People probably come in and out of this place all the time. "Maybe next time I'll find something," I say with a bright smile. He is a bit taken aback at the thought of another possible meeting. I give him a quick look over and decide that he's quite attractive. He has jet black hair that pairs well with his porcelain skin, and not a blemish to be seen, at least from my distance. He's wearing a denim button up under a dark blue sweater with small horizontal red lines. It fits his form but doesn't hug it too tightly and dome black skinny jeans from what I can see.

"See ya," I say as I leave the store with a smile and a wave. I hear a pleasant 'goodbye, come again!' from inside the store and chuckle again to myself. I smirk and continue to make my way down the sidewalk as the wind blows a particularly icy breeze.

Walking through the park is short but nice. It's good to know the shortcuts in the park, with it being so huge and all. With the leaves of the trees gone there is a clear view of the sky, 'I might take a walk through here tonight. Maybe I'll even see a few stars if I'm lucky'.

It's highly doubtful though, with all this light pollution it's a miracle you can see any stars at night. But, it's always nice to hope. Parents and nannies run by with children. A mom in particular has her poor four year old looking like he's ready to brace the arctic circle. I chuckle as the little guy waddles like a penguin, trying to divert his mother's attention to a squirrel he sees running up one of the park trees. Staring longingly at the kid I keep walking, pushing the thought to the back of my mind as I can see the exit of the park ahead. The thought resurfaces for a brief moment, I pull my phone out of my jacket pocket, scroll through the contacts and press talk pulling it up to my ear. It rings and the voice answers.

"Yes Naruto?"

"Kyu, what are my plans for Sunday?" I say as I see the mother looking over to where her son is pointing enthusiastically. I hear the clicking of a computer keyboard over the phone.

"You have a short meeting in the morning at 11 that should end around 12:30. Why?"

"I'm thinking of putting in a visit with mom that afternoon. It's been a month and all." I say into the phone

"Sure thing," with more clicking in the background she comes back on, "you are free the rest of the day so you can go. Should I set up for a car to take you from the company there?"

"Have it take me home first, then there."

"Ok, will that be all?"

"Yes, thank you very much Kyu." I say into the phone, I can sense that she's smiling into the phone as she replies.

"You are very welcome Naruto." After that the connection cuts and I return my phone to its place in my pocket.

'God it's getting cold out here,' I mumble as I pull my jacket closer to my body.

Passing shop after shop, there's not much to do. Standing at a crosswalk waiting for the light to change, I look up to see a small café on the corner of an alley on the other side of the street. It's small, maybe won't be too crowded. At this time of day, that quite unlikely. A hot cup of coffee does sound great right now. Could get something to eat too. The crosswalk sign beeps to cross and I make my way over to the cafe. Looks to have been here for a while. Could have been here for god knows how long. I hardly walk in this area of the city. There are a lot more interesting shops that I have found. I might actually just start coming by here more often.

The bell of the door jingles as I open it. I am immediately surrounded by the warmth from bathe heating inside and it starts to melt away the cold from walking around. Most of which was just walking aimlessly about shops and through the park. Its a cozy place not too small but not big enough to house the morning rush at a Starbucks.

Looking up at the neatly written order of drinks, pastries, food options, and such, I ramble off my order of medium coffee and a berry scone. Tapping up the order and moving over to the display to pull out my pastry and put it in a brown wax paper bag I then go over to the brewer.

"Would you like room for cream?" she asks me before dispensing the coffee.

"Oh, yes please. Thank you very much," I reply with a smile. She returns the smile and fills my cup of coffee with room at the top so when I add cream it won't stream everywhere. I've done that far too many times. I put my coffee alongside my pastries on the counter as she rings it up.

"That will be $4.57, sir," she says with another kind smile. Handing her a five and getting my change back, I thank her again. "Have a good day!" she says as I make my way over to the condiment station, pour cream in, and add one too many sugars. Turning around I look around for a spot to sit and relax. Was this place this crowded when I first came in? Looking around from the front to the back tables there doesn't seem to be a spot. Sighing, I make my way down the walkway in search of a place to sit.

This is the problem with cafes, small ones in particular. People have their bags occupying all the chairs at a table that could fit four while the only occupant is sipping their coffee and swiping away at his phone or typing away on their laptop. As I'm about to turn back around I see someone a few booths from the back. As I get closer, I realize it's the kid from the book store. He has his earphones in, focusing on a paper probably. Judging by the many business books stacked to the left of his laptop and the one he currently had open with highlighter marks and post-its stuck to the pages. He's completely oblivious to anyone around him. Making my way over till I'm not quite standing in front of him, not to freak him out, but close enough for him to see me. The entire other side of the booth is free and it's the only other free one in the whole cafe. Clearing my throat in an attempt to make my presence known goes unnoticed.

"Hello?" I say, still nothing. Leaning my head over to the side to hopefully catch his gaze, "Hello?" I say with a small wave of my hand to get his attention. Successfully he notices and glances up. It takes him a few seconds to register what is going on. He stutters a little and pulls out his earphones.

"I-I'm sorry," he has a small blush creeping onto his cheeks, faint but still there, "Oh, h-hi again, you're from the bookstore this morning," he says as he puts his earphones on his open textbook and looks back up to me.

"Sorry to bother you," I say as I scratch the back of my head, "I wanted to ask if you wouldn't mind me sitting here. See everywhere else is taken so," letting the sentence drag and fade there because I believe I got my point across. He looks a little taken aback by my request but with a slow nod he lets me sit.

"Thank you very much. Sorry again to bother you, I'm Naruto," I smile as I slowly take my seat opposite him. "If for any reason you want me to leave then, by all means-"

"N-No, it's no bother, I'm Sasuke," He slightly squirms in his seat, "Sorry for not noticing you standing there. Been working on this paper for one of my lectures today," he says lightly, scratching his cheek as if to rub his blush away.

"No, it's not a problem. School work is important. By all means don't let me distract you," I take a sip of my coffee as I see what he'll do. He smiles, putting an earbud back in and continuing to type away whilst occasionally glancing at his textbook for reference.

"If you don't mind me asking," I ask. He raises his head to me, "what degree are you going in for?" I take another couple of sips of my coffee and put it back down when he's about to answer.

"Business," he sort of states with a sigh, not taking his eyes or hands off his laptop.

"Yeah, those courses are pretty brutal. Hardest three years of my life. But, it's all worth it in the end," I say, taking another sip of my coffee. My comment seems to get him interested.

"You're in business as well?" He says, as he takes his earphone out of his ear again, giving me his full attention.

"Yeah. Taking over the family business so I got my MBA." I say, as I start working on my scone. He chuckles a little and sighs.

"That makes two of us then," he says with a crooked smile, fidgeting with one of the pencils that he was using to take notes, "my brother is more cut out for it than I am but, have to be prepared."

"Business not what you want to do?" I say with curiosity. Seeming a little taken aback by the question, he seems to be mulling over his thoughts of whether he should say at all or not.

"Well, not really," looking down at his lap, "But, it's what I'm expected to do." He says with a sigh.

"Hmm," thinking of a way to turn the conversation around, "If you could take anything right now what would it be?" Lifting his head, he looks at me with a bit of confusion and curiosity, like he knows what I'm asking but still wants to ask.

"What do you mean?" now giving me his full attention.

"Like," I lean back and think of how to elaborate, "if you could choose any career, anything. What would you want to choose?" I finish off my coffee and my scone and wait for him to answer. He seems to be putting a lot of thought into his answer, looking back down at his lap and fidgeting with his hands. After a minute or two he looks out the window.

"Umm, to be honest, I've always enjoyed art," for a moment he sets his gaze back to his hands, "In exchange for taking all of the classes necessary for my business degree I get one art class," he says with a true smile as he continues to look at his hands, "It may be one but it has to be my favorite class of the week."

"Looks like it really makes you happy", he looks back up at me, trying to see if it was a mocking statement, but finding nothing that would suggest so. "It's good to have something you're passionate about, something you enjoy greatly." I take a look out at the tree branches waving in the strong breeze that has kicked up since I got here.

"What about you?" I turn my head back to the voice the question came from. "Oh, umm, I-I was going to ask you the same thing. Is there some kind of dream career that you want?" He lowers his head a bit, as if he may have asked the wrong question. I give him a kind smile to reassure him that it's all right.

"I don't think it's much of a career, but I like to be a person to motivate people. Friends of my parents say that I'm a born leader, like my father is, and that I have the loud encouraging personality of my mother," I smile at him, "friends of hers and my father's tell me how much I remind them of her. Aside from the hair," I chuckle as I twist a few strands between my fingers, "she had long pin straight red hair. I get this unruly blonde from my dad. Though his always seems to look better than mine," I smile while ruffling my head.

"It looks good. It suits your bright personality," he says shyly, but then his blush comes back full fledged. Seems like he didn't mean for that to come out. He stutters for a moment and looks back down at his hands on his lap.

"Thank you," I chuckle to him, genuinely flattered by the compliment. He looks back up to meet my eyes, the blush still on his cheeks. We settled into a comfortable conversation, talking about this and that. More so myself talking for long periods of time and him responding when he found it appropriate. Once he became more comfortable, he started to share more about himself. From his studies in high school to his current courses in college. He talked about how his dad is the strict and stoic type that you don't typically want to defy, but when he grows fond of you, can be quite kind. How his mother is the sweetest person ever and always supported and continues to support him and his personal interests. She always bought him sketchbooks, paints, charcoals, etc. How his father made him go for a business degree so that he would know how to run the family business successfully when his brother and him inherited it. How his father believes that art is a pointless profession, without meaning or profit. But that his mother and elder brother have continued to supported his art endeavors. They even convinced his father into letting him take one art class of his choosing as long as he took all of the other classes that his father required him to take. After a long week of business, finances, economics, profits and such, it was a wondrous stress reliever to go into the art studio and throw all of his pent up energy into his art pieces.

"What art do you take? If you don't mind me asking," my coffee and scone long gone at this point.

"Advanced Drawing and Painting" he says.

"Wow, you ought to be extremely talented!" I say with true excitement, "you wouldn't by any means have anything you could show me?" He looks at me tentatively, then begins to shuffle through his backpack for a green spiral book. The edges are tattered, showing its constant use. Pulling it out and he flips through the pages 'till he settles on one and hands it over.

"Don't worry about smudging it, I've already sprayed it so it's ok." Looking at him and then back to the book being handed to me, I reach for it and begin to examine the art before me. It's beautiful. It's of the huge fountain in the center of the park that I can see from my house. Everything is in perfect detail. The charcoal is smudged perfectly to illustrate the shadow. It's as if someone took a black and white photograph and pasted it on the very page I'm admiring. "This one is kind of new. Mostly landscape sketches from the park," he says shyly, "you can look through if you want," he says more to the table than me with a sense of worry and nervousness.

"Really?!" I say in an enthusiastic manner. He looks taken aback by my positive response. He just stares at me and nods slowly. I flip to the next page to see the same location but it's of an elderly couple sitting at a park bench, holding hands while feeding the pigeons as they flock to them for bird seed. A smile makes its way onto my lips while I scan my eyes over each part of the intricate drawings. "Wow, these are beautiful. They really are. You're incredibly talented Sasuke," I say to him with a genuinely kind smile on my face as I go back to looking tentatively at each work of art. "I glance up through my bangs to see Sasuke fidgeting with his hands again but with the most genuine smile of happiness you could see on one's face. "Have you shown your parents or brother these?" I say as I carefully hand him back his sketchbook. His eyes move back up to meet mine, smile still in place.

"Just my mother and brother. They really love them and encourage me to continue," for a moment his smile falters, "my father thinks it's time that could be used on more important things. He tried to take me out of my art class with the argument 'that it was putting a strain on my work in the classes that he deems more important'," with a sigh, putting his elbow on the table and resting his cheek with his eyes on his hand playing with the pencil, he continued, "I focused completely on both, so that neither would suffer. My grades in all of his classes were perfect and I was still participating fully in my art class," he leaned into his hand, sighing and giving a small chuckle, as his smile came back, "his face when I showed him my grades," he chuckles again, "it was priceless. He never thought I had it in me. But I proved him wrong. And if I keep it up, I can keep an art class until I graduate, with the exception of continuing to take his classes," he says this with not much enthusiasm.

I'm mesmerized by this kid. This kid with a business tycoon of a dad steps up for what he's passionate about. "That must have taken a lot of guts. Your dad doesn't seem like the kind of guy you would want to piss off."

"No, no he's not," he says humorously.

"Well, it's good you did that," he meets my eyes, waiting for me to elaborate. "People lose track of the things that make them, well them. Instead, most follow the careers that will give them the most success, the most fame or respect, but end up even less happy than they were before. But some are able to be successful and be truly happy. Everyone is different. My dad always says 'have a job that you enjoy going to every time you have to go to it'. That's what I want to do, do something that makes me feel happy that I'm doing it. Like I'm actually doing some good that will help others," glancing outside as the wind starts to settle down, "you know?" I look back at him and he looks at me with this look of deep understanding.

"Yeah, no I get that. Not make your mark necessarily, but make this life you're living worth all the time you put into it."

Smiling a happy smile towards him, "yeah, exactly," at this point a silence came into the conversation, but not an awkward one, "So, you work in a bookstore," I state. For a second he gets a confused look on his face, as if wondering how I know this. But then he quickly recovers with the memory of this morning.

"Yeah, I needed money to pay for my art supplies outside of class, to practice, and I guess I just grew fond of the working there. There's not much that I do there," he says with a shrug.

"What do you do?" I ask out of curiosity.

"Open, set the displays up, help customers find and purchase things, basic stuff. Running the morning shift is really peaceful. No one really comes into a bookstore in the morning"

"Except me," I smirk at my interjection. He chuckles.

"Yes, except for you. Other than that, it's pretty slow, I just get to sit around and read books. Plus it's just a few blocks from the park that I love to sketch. It's the only place beside the schools art studio that can feel at ease"

"I know what you mean. It's good that you have places that you can call your own, without the worry of others. A place you can stop and breath a clear breath of air."

"Do you have one?" confused for a second before, "a place to call yours?", saying this shyly. I lean back because it doesn't take me much time at all.

"I don't actually have one, yet. But, when I find it, I'll know it." I finish with a smile, he looks and smiles then down to his lap.

* * *

As we exit the cafe it's the start of the afternoon, too early to head back home. "You busy right now?" I ask, he pauses wrapping his scarf around his neck and stares at me. "I'm mean if you're busy that's ok. I just, thought I'd ask" i say while finding an interest in the cracks in the sidewalk.

"U-Umm," he stammers for a second then looks at his watch, "well it's almost 11:40 right now. My art class starts in an hour. You can come along with me if you want"

"Really!" coughing to settle down my excitement, "I mean, if that's alright with you?" he seems to be in a small state of shock and his blush is coming back while he opens his mouth and manages to stumble out a yes. "Awesome, which way is it to your school? You lead the way," his blush reaches the entirety of his cheeks, he rubs at them with his hand as if to erase their existence.

"On the other side of town. It's on the opposite side of the park. If we take our time we can make it there." nodding his head in the direction for me to follow. As we come up to wait for the light to cross over, a crowd of people start to form, also waiting to cross. As the crowd builds, people begin to move to stand in front of us, trying to get closer to the street. That's the problem with living in a populated city. Myself being 6 foot makes it easy for me to see my way through. Sasuke, on the other hand, is a few inches shorter than myself. He's maybe 5'9", at most 5'10". As we get ready to cross, I reach over and grab Sasuke's hand just as the crossing light starts to beep for us to walk. I feel him freeze for a moment but follow me through the crowd. With people pushing and shoving back and forth trying to make their way through the crowd, Sasuke and I are pushed close together. Sasuke's hand tightens around mine. I sense he's gone a bit rigid and his palms are starting to sweat. I can feel his pulse racing through his hand. Oh no, I hope he isn't claustrophobic. With force I plow our way through. Just one more streetlight to wait at and we will be at the park. Looking down, his cheeks are bright red and his breath is coming out in small puffs visible from the top of his scarf with his eyes just a tad bit wide. Finally, the crosswalk sign starts to beep to signal we can cross and I pull Sasuke close to me to maneuver our way through the crowd. When we reach the other side I make our way out of the crowd coming up from behind us.

"God, it can get really crowded," I say as I take a few breaths. Looking down at him he has his eyes trained on our still joined hands. "Sasuke? Sasuke, are you ok?" nothing, leaning forward and waving my hand in front of his view he responds immediately gripping my hand and looking straight back up at me.

"I-I I'm sorry, did you say something?" he says, his cheeks still flushed.

"Are you ok? You went rigid back there. I didn't know if you're claustrophobic and you were having a panic attack so I just got you out of the crowd as fast as I could. You feeling better?" I ask genuinely curious to see what freaked him out before. He just stares at me with a confused look, "you were acting really nervous when all the people were around us so I thought maybe you might be claustrophobic." His confusion quickly turns into flustered embarrassment.

"Oh! No, it's fine! Really!" he says waving his free hand in front of himself.

"Oh good, you scared me a tad back there," I release a sigh of relief. "So, where to now?"

"Hm? Oh, umm this way," he says as he pulls our still linked hands, seeming to have completely forgotten about it. Making our way into the forested park the cut off from the sun and the continued chilling breeze starts to take a toll. Releasing Sasuke's hand I look into my bag to pull out a thicker jacket.

"You mind holding this for a second?" I say handing over my messenger bag to him. Giving a small nod he takes it and I'm able to shrug on my jacket with a few moments of fixing the sweater and shirt underneath. After fixing the collar I stretch my hand back out to him "Thanks, it's gotten so cold lately I've taken to just carrying a winter jacket just incase," I sling my bag back over my neck to my other shoulder and have the bag rest on my back.

As we walk through the path of the park, with the direction of Sasuke, we fall back into comfortable conversation. "So you've lived here your whole life?"

"Yeah, and today was the first time I have been in the bookstore you work at. Shows there's still a lot of exploring I have to do," I say as I look up at the branches above us as we walk. "What about you? You live here too?"

"My family moved here for business about a year ago. Plus it was near the college my father has me going to. At first I was really against it. Leaving my friends back home. Right when I thought I was just going to be miserable here, on the first day I passed a bulletin board in one of the hallways. I saw that they had a free spot in a drawing and painting class at my college. At first I ignored it. But when it was still there after a couple of days I decided to just go up and see if the spot for a student was still free," the same genuine smile from when I complimented his art was back, "I never thought that the teacher would think I had the potential to be in her class. But she greatly enjoyed my work and signed me into the class. Since then, it's been my favorite place to be."

"It really makes you that genuinely happy huh," I smile at him, turning with the same smile in place.

"Really, how so?" he asks.

"Just by how you talk about it and how it makes you feel. And," I say while reaching my hand over and tapping my index finger to the corner of his smile, "because you give a smile that shows so," his blush ignites on his cheeks as he quickly turns his face away. Laughing it off we continue walking. Out of the corner of my eyes I see him rubbing where I poked him. He has an embarrassed look on his face but then, as his hand stills in place, a small heart warming smile makes its way onto his face. For a while we just walk in a comfortable silence through the rest of the park. I look over at Sasuke every once in a while and he seems deep in thought. After he almost walks into a crowd of people I reach over and grab his hand to lead him out of the way. With nothing showing he wants me to remove my hand I keep our hands joined. It helps, with how spaced out he seems to be. Casting my gaze from him to up in front of me I see the exit. On our getting closer to it a large school looking building comes into view. Nudging Sasuke with my shoulder I get his attention back.

"Hmm?" he asks

"We're here I think."

At that Sasuke looks forward at the school that's coming closer and closer. A look of disappointment comes across his face. We walk out of the park and come to a halt standing at the open area.

Sasuke looks down and shuffles his feet finding the floor more interesting. "Umm, thank you for walking me here."

"Not a problem! It was really nice, thank you for letting me accompany you." I give an eye closing smile. He pulls his eyes away from me as his cheeks flush again when I let his hand go.

"Well, yeah. Umm.. t-thank you again for..uh..walking me here." He gazes up at me, his bangs covering some of his eyes.

Chuckling again, I say, "You're welcome." I watch Sasuke start to walk towards the crosswalk leading to the college, turning back once more to give a small wave back to me.

Making my way to the crosswalk I wait for the signal to change, 'great now I have to wait', while standing for a few moments I ponders on the morning 'I should have gotten his number. Well there goes your chance Sasuke, you'll probably never see the only person you've ever actually found an interest in in this blasted city again', while mulling over his thoughts he doesn't notice the racing footsteps coming up to him until…

"Hey Sasuke! Hold up a sec!" turning around, Sasuke sees Naruto running towards him. Sasuke tries to keep his hopes from getting too high and get his heart rate to calm the fuck down. All this is making the blush come back to his cheeks. "I had a really awesome time talking and hanging out with you and I wanted to know if you would mind doing this again?" Naruto says, giving a smile and scratching the back of his neck out of nervous habit.

Sasuke stares for a moment at first, in disbelief that this is actually happening, and then begins to get a little flustered. Naruto chuckles at his behavior.

"Umm, y-yeah, t-that would be cool," Sasuke says, not as steady as he would have liked his voice to be. Naruto's eyes widen with the genuinely happy smile that makes its way on my face.

"Great, can I get your number then?" he asks. Sasuke stutters out a yes and they exchange numbers, "awesome, so I'll call you later?"

"Y-Yeah."

"Ok! Talk to you later!" Naruto says as he runs back towards the park. Sasuke stands there in shock but his arm waves him off.

When Naruto is out of sight the crosswalk beeps for me to walk and wakes me from my stupor. Crossing the street I make my way onto the campus. The whole journey to art class my mind is elsewhere. 'Did that really happen?', while on autopilot I find my way inside the art building on campus, up to the second floor and into the classroom. When I get seated there are only a few students inside. They are still setting all of their supplies up, 'good I'm early' I think to myself. After setting down on a stool behind an easel I start unpacking my supplies. Pulling out a larger sketchbook for class, charcoals, etc. Once settled in my pocket vibrates, pulling my phone out the screen says he has a new text. As he swipes the screen open to see what it says his blush, that had finally vanished, returns. The text reads:

Naruto:

'Hope you have a great art class!'

Trying to will away the growing blush and rapidly beating heart rate, I take a few good deep breaths. My heartrate complies but the blush is still there, again touching the cheek Naruto poked, "What have I gotten myself into?" he mutters to himself.

* * *

With small light strokes of his pencil an outline starts to take shape on the large canvas leaning against the wall of the spacious studio. When it came to drawing and painting my mind would seem to switch into this ultimate state of auto-pilot. My full attention being on the large white blank emptiness in front of me, patiently waiting to be created into whatever my mind deemed fit. Starting from the center left side and branching out from there the painting starts to take shape. My hand seems to move of its own accord, my mind wanders to a certain individual that had been on my mind for most, if not all, of the afternoon. Finished with outlining, I start bringing out the acrylics, taking my time to mix each color to the desired greys and browns to fit the winter park. After that I start to work on Naruto's attire, saving his face for last. Starting with the warm shade of his skin. I then move onto his eyes, bringing out all of the lighter blues in the iris by contrasting them with a darker color. After mixing blue after blue I come to the closest shade that resembled them. They started out slightly darker around the edges of the iris and then became a light crystal blue around the pupil.

The teacher made her way along the classroom, eyeing everyone's work. She would stop for no more than a few moments at each student and then move on to the next. She reached my painting as I'm adding a couple of final touches to the face before going into more detail on the background. She marvels in the creation thus far.

"Beautiful work as always Sasuke," broken from my day dreaming, I was startled to find out that I had started drawing Naruto, "will we be seeing this in the studio's open house?"

"Oh," taken aback quite a bit by the suggestion I quickly mull it over, "do you really think it has potential ma'am?"

With a smile she replies, "Indeed I do. Whoever this young man is, he's certainly had a lasting impression on you. As you were." The teacher goes back to making her way about the room, I takes another look at his work. My heart flutters as he remembers. It's of Naruto when he was walking me through the park to class earlier that morning. Naruto had taken a moment to look upon one of the huge leafless trees. He was looking up with the most blissful smile spread across his warm face. A cloud of vapor escaped from his mouth as he exhaled deeply, breathing into the chilled air. At first glance, your eyes would immediately focus on Naruto's soft sun blonde hair, it shined brightly in contrast to the dark background surrounding him but that wasn't the most astonishing feature about him. Anyone who spent more than a couple of minutes in conversation with him would become mesmerized by his eyes. The light blue crystal necklace hidden in his soft grey sweater accentuated them, almost demanding you to stare into them. Sasuke was fascinated by them.

"I've got it bad," I mutter, wiping the sweat off my brow as I shake my head and sigh. I lift my gaze to give my artwork another glance.

* * *

**what do you think?**

**This is my first fanfiction and its for my nanowrimo.**

**Please Please review! Feedback is the best at this point.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you guys so much for the positive response so far! oh my goodness! I could not have asked for a better response!**

**The next chapter, chapter three is in the works, and may take a while to get done! So I hope that this chapter is enough for you guys for now :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. *****_cries_*******

**Without further ado, Chapter Two:**

* * *

Stroke after stroke I pull myself further through crystal clear water. Pulling one arm over the other I swim through until I get to the edge and then push off of the wall, starting another lap. Losing track of time I continue lap after lap until I feel I've done enough. I slowly swim over to the railing and hoist myself up and out of the warm water. Striding over to the lounge chair where my things are, I grab my towel. I run it over my face and rub it in my hair to get rid of any remaining water. Letting my breath even out from the strenuous workout I glance up at the clock hanging above the exit which reads 8 am. 'I still have the driver coming around ten. 'I think to myself. Throwing my towel over my shoulder I walk over to the double doors and into the locker room. One of the good things about living in a high class condominium complex is that there is a full lap pool and gym that the residents have full access to with the swipe of a card they give you when you move in. What's even better is that I'm the only one that seems to be using them. Which I'm fine with. I don't have to deal with people while I'm trying to get my workout routine in. Next in line is the treadmill. Making it to my locker I untie and pull my trunks off and put them in a plastic bag that goes into my duffel. I towel myself dry and put on a pair of boxers and running shorts. I decide to run shirtless because it's less laundry to do. Plus I'm pretty confident in my body. Walking into the gym I see that there's no one in, typical on a saturday morning. I hook my phone up to the airplay in the gym's speakers and I put my playlist on shuffle, 'Do I Wanna Know' by The Arctic Monkeys comes up. I turn up the song until the beat pumps through the speakers and gives a small rumble to the floor. I turn on the treadmill to start at a steady jog as the singer starts,

_"Have you got color in your cheeks'._

_Do you ever get the feeling that you can't shift the tide that sticks around like something's in your teeth?_

_And some aces up your sleeve, I had no idea that you're in deep?_

_I dreamt about you near me every night this week._

_How many secrets can you keep?_

_'Cause there's this tune I found that makes me think of you somehow and I play it on repeat._

_Until I fall asleep, spilling drinks on my settee."_

Settling into a steady jog I start to sweat. I only have to run a mile because the laps in the pool take up most of my workout. I let my mind get lost in the lyrics as I continue jogging.

_"(Do I wanna know?)_

_If this feeling flows both ways_

_(Sad to see you go)_

_Was sorta hoping that you'd stay_

_(Baby we both know)_

_That the nights were mainly made for saying things that you can't say tomorrow day._

_Crawlin' back to you._

_Ever thought of calling when, you've had a few?_

_'Cause I always do._

_Maybe I'm too, busy being yours to fall for somebody new, Now I've thought it through._

_Crawling back to you."_

_As the song plays my thoughts seem to focus back to yesterday, back to Sasuke._

_So have you got the guts?_

_Been wondering if your heart's still open and if so I wanna know what time it shuts._

_Simmer down and pucker up._

_I'm sorry to interrupt it's just I'm constantly on the cusp of trying~ to kiss you._

_But I don't know if you feel the same as I do._

_But we could be together, if you wanted to."_

I hadn't even thought about dating again until after I sat down and actually talked to him. Everyone who ever took an interest in me was either just physically attracted to me or knew of my family's financial status. But Sasuke...

_"(Do I wanna know?)_

_If this feeling flows both ways_

_(Sad to see you go)_

_Was sorta hoping that you'd stay_

_(Baby we both know)_

_That the nights were mainly made for saying things that you can't say tomorrow day."_

Sasuke was different from the people I had dated before. I had long ago discovered that I was bi-sexual. I liked both genders. Friends called me greedy for it but I just like who I like. Be them male or female.

_"Crawling back to you_

_(Crawling back to you)_

_Ever thought of calling when you've had a few?_

_(calling when you've had a few)_

_'Cause I always do_

_('cause I always do)_

_Maybe I'm too busy being yours to fall for somebody new_

_Now I've thought it through_

_Crawling back to you"_

I wondered whether there was a possibility that Sasuke may be gay, or even just bi. If so...would he like me? Thinking back to yesterday, Sasuke was quiet and fidgeting for most of our meeting.

_"(do I wanna know?)_

_If this feeling flows both ways_

_(Sad to see you go)_

_Was sorta hoping that you'd stay_

_(Baby we both know)_

_That the nights were mainly made for that you can't say tomorrow day_

_(Do I wanna know?)_

_Too busy being yours to fall_

_(Sad to see you go)_

_Ever thought of calling darling?_

_(Do I wanna know)_

_Do you want me crawling back to you?"_

The song plays and then comes to a quick end, next on the list is **'Down The Road'** by **C2C**, which starts off jazzy. The soft beginning to this song gives me a short time to slow down and catch my breath a bit before going full speed again.

"Oh-oh-oh-woo.

Mmmmhmmm.

Then the electronic beat starts to kick in and gets me pumped. As it drops I start up into a strong pace.

_"Have no place to go._

_Have no place to go, darling._

_Have no place to go._

_Have no place to go."_

'I wonder if Sasuke's free later this afternoon,' I think to myself.

_"Goodbye baby._

_Yes, I'm going._

_Ahhhhh,_

_Yes, I'm going._

_Goodbye baby._

_Ahhhh,_

_Yes I'm going."_

Thinking about exercise for a moment, 'I wonder if Sasuke ever works out. I mean from what I saw he's lean but still looks like he has some muscle on him. He probably runs.

_"Have no place to go, mmmmm._

_Have no place to go, darling._

_Have no place to go, ohhhh._

_Have no place to go, darling._

_Goodbye baby._

_Yes, I'm going._

_Ahhhhh,_

_Yes, I'm going._

_Goodbye baby._

_Ahhhh,_

_Yes I'm going._

_Down the road I go._

_Down the road I go._

_Down the road I go._

_Down the road I go."_

My mind fades from the music to my thoughts. I wasn't able to tell from the layers that he was wearing when we first met, but he seemed pretty lean. It's funny how I have met people before, had conversations. But Sasuke, is the only one at the moment that seems to come into my thoughts no matter what. But I can't let myself get dragged in too quickly, we know how that worked out last time'.

I've had a few relationships, not too many, a couple of hookups but there were only two serious relationships. I guess these could be those instances where I discovered that I was bisexual. I had dated a girl in highschool for about 2 and a half years. She had broken it off saying that she had gotten bored with me and found me uninteresting. That was a lie though. Later on I had heard that she had only dated me because of my last name and was only interested in the title and 'luxury' that came with it, though that was just a rumor. I had a few short relationships with guys and girls but no one really clicked so I broke them off. My second serious relationship was with a guy I had met in college. For me, we really clicked, we had been together for about a year and half before I found out, first hand, that he had been cheating on his current boyfriend of 3 years with me. After that one I just stopped dating for a while.

After being used, and then being 'the other person', there was no relationship that I really put my full attention into. I guess that where a few of the hook ups came into play. It wasn't the same, doing something intimate with someone who doesn't embrace you as a person, and is just there for the sex or a quick fuck. It scratched the itch, in a sense. But, there's nothing like having that moment when the other person knows your feelings and reciprocate those feelings back with the same intensity. Though, I guess I'll never even know what that feels like, being in both cases, there was no reciprocated affection, it was just about money and sex. That's all.

So who do you trust? When your name is as well known as mine, how do you pick out the ones that truly want you and not the name that comes along with it? There are a few options. You shut everyone out, don't let anyone in. No strings-attached. Or, you can continue being hopeful. Maybe get your heartbroken a few more times...or a lot of times. But eventually find that one person that is there for you.

* * *

***FLASHBACK STARTS***

I was at a fundraiser a year or two back and there was a poet performing, talking about how she had made a program to help people use spoken word poetry.

Whilst taking my seat, I leaned against the wall near enough to the stage to hear her.

When I started listening she said, "Now I know the number one rule to being cool, is to seem unfazed. To never admit that anything scares you, or impresses you, or excites you," this I knew to be true, after everything that was currently going on in the shitstorm that seemed to be my life, I had learned to be like this, to wear a mask so to speak. She continued, "Somebody once told me its like walking through life, like this," puts her arms up in a defensive stance using her bent arms as if to shield herself from an attacker, at first I didn't get it, but I was intrigued, "you protect yourself from all the unexpected miseries or hurt that might show up," its as if she was speaking to me directly, "but, I try to walk through life like this," she took down her defensive stance and instead reached out and opened her hands as if to catch something falling from the sky, "and yes that means catching all those miseries and hurt but it also means that when beautiful, amazing things just fall out of the sky I am ready to catch them*".

After listening to her, I pulled myself together as much as I could muster and made my way to one of the private bathrooms. Locking myself in I leaned against the wall next to door, grabbed a rag they have for you to dry your hands and held in over my nose and mouth. Sob after silent sob ripped through me, as I let all that I had been feeling out. Leaning against the wall I just stared, tears still streaming down my face. 'How?', was the only thing I continued to ask myself. How can, after all I've gone through, let down my defenses, and be open and willing to be hurt over and over, just so by some small strike of fate, I find one person, that may not even exist. Reaching into my pocket, I swipe and type a quick message, send it and try to get my breathing to even out before returning the phone to my suit pocket. I feel like I've been hit me in the gut and then punched we in the head. My body won't stop shaking. The hyperventilating won't stop. Every emotion that I had tucked away, made people believe I was unfazed, all at once. It took all I could to keep myself upright.

Whilst taking a small polite sip of her water she hears her blackberry vibrate in her clutch. Reaching over and unlocking the new text, she remains unfazed, as to not startle the tenants at her table.

"If you'll excuse me for a moment", she says with a sweet smile and a bow before leaving the table and making her way to the Private bathrooms. When she reaches the door she knocks twice. "Naruto? It's just me." she says in a quiet tone. She hears the lock unclick and lets herself in. Before looking she turns around and locks the door. Taking a step back, shes able to see him. His eyes bloodshot from sobbing, body shaking, a rag over his mouth and nose to muffle his sobbing. "Oh Naruto", Concern is evident in her eyes, and she walks over very calmly, setting her clutch on the counter in the process. She crouches down so that she is at his level and looks at him with loving eyes. With not another word wraps her arms around his torso. After a few moments Naruto wraps his arms around her and lays his heavy head on her petite shoulder, continuing to breath in shallow ragged breaths. Lifting an arm from around his torso she runs her hand through his soft blonde hair at the base of his scalp. "Shh, I've got you, I got you." saying soothing words until his breathing evens out.

With all the will he could muster he barely mumbles out, "Can we go home?". It was the most heartbreakingly vulnerable thing she had ever heard him say, coming from the boy who put the the shine in sunshine and had a smile on his face no matter what life threw at him.

"Yeah, let me just let your dad know ok? You want me to go tell him-" with a slight squeeze she knew. "Ok, Let me just get my phone to let him know, ok?", reluctantly Naruto let go. Making her way over to her clutch she takes her phone back out, and with a few clicks and she puts the phone up to her ear, Naruto still sniffling behind her.

"Yes Kurama?" says Minato on the other line.

"Sir, I'm going to be taking Naruto home. He's quite tired and would like to get some rest after such a busy day."

"Sure, that's fine. Thank you for telling me. Have a good evening."

"Thank you, have a good one as well, sir." Pushing the end button she makes a quick text to their driver and then places her phone back into her clutch. She then turns around to look at Naruto. He has his head downcast to the floor and his breath was still a bit ragged from his breakdown. His eyes were so void of everything, every emotion at once evident in them. "Our driver is out front, he will take us. I'll be coming with you if thats ok?" she ask quietly. He gives a small, almost unnoticeable nod. "Ok, here take my hand," after a second or two Naruto slowly reaches his hand out and takes Kyu's in his, "I've got you, Naruto, ok?" With another nod they unlock and leave the restroom and head for the front. The elevator ride and walk to the front to meet the car is silent. Once seated in the back of the car it started in the direction of Naruto's. Naruto leans over and rests his head on Kyus shoulder. Snaking her arm around him she rubs soothingly at his arm while resting her cheek in soft blonde hair.

***End Of Flashback***

* * *

The silence of the music finally hits me and breaks me from my daydreaming. I look at the time and see that I've gone half an hour over my initial hour workout and the weak jello feeling in my legs that confirms that. Turning the treadmill off I make my way out of the gym and into the locker and shower rooms to wash the chlorine and sweat caked to my body. Opening my locker to pull out a bag of all my shower necessities and a towel, stripping off my running shorts and briefs all in one go and putting them into my duffel to take back to my house. With that done I close, lock my locker and make my way over to one of the shower stalls. Hooking my towel outside I close the curtain behind me. I move over to the side to adjust the water to the perfect temperature. I feel it out I move into it. The warm, slightly cold water does the job in cooling my body down and relaxing all of my strained muscles.

Reaching over for my hooked bag of shampoo, soap, conditioner, all of that stuff. I first pull out a small travel sized shampoo, after drenching my hair under the running water I work it into my hair to wash all of the grease out. My fingers massage gently into my scalp making me more and more relaxed. After lathering from root to tip I turn and let the steamy water rinse away all the suds. Reaching back into the bag I reach for the bottle of conditioner, pouring a liberal amount into my palm, I work it into my hair. While I wait for the conditioner, I then pull out a rag and a bar of soap. Lathering up the rag with soap, I start to work away all of the sweat thats formed to my skin. Scrubbing every inch from my face down my neck to broad shoulders and defined collarbone. Then to my toned chest and reaching behind to scrub down my lean back. Down my thighs and calves. Cleaning my manhood last. Leaning back into the ray of the shower I run my hands along myself, from throw my silk like hair down to get rid of any leftover suds.

God there is nothing better than taking a shower after a long workout.

The car ride is silent, it always is. To avoid it I usually have music pumping into my ears through my earphones that are in my bag in the seat beside me. Though this ride I let the silence in. Its nice, calming. It's not that unnerving form of silence that results in you fidgeting. But the kind that let my mind peacefully wander, to no place in particular. The place you find happy, comforting. Closing my eyes and resting my head back on the seats headrest I let my mind wander. I imagine myself laying down a lush green endless field, with patches of orange poppies, and white daisies, mother's favorite flowers. The sun shining above warms me with its rays. Sitting up I feel the soft green grass and rich earth under my palms and feet as I stand up. To my right is a grove of towering redwoods. A cool air is being emitted from inside the shaded grove. Walking towards it the scent of grass and flowers changes to that of a deep, thick forest. Coming into its entrance its as if the forest itself is inviting me inside. The terrain changes from that of soft warm grass for cool soil and leaves, the crack of a twig or two as I make my way through. Peering up from my steps I marvel at the king of the grove. He towers over all the rest, in height and age. He's wise beyond his years. Coming to its base my hand runs across the rough bark of the gentle tree. Gazing up I can see a glimmer of light thats let in through the canopy. Taking a moment I crouch down and sit at the base of the great tower. Redwoods are what I strive to be, they are sturdy, grounded, taking much more than a minimal wind to knock over this giant. But they are also as old as they come. Some being here for hundreds of years. Running my hands along the bark and feeling it once more, 'If only I could be like a redwood, strong, tall and wise. I guess I already have the grounded part.' Looking back up to the groves canopy, nearly falling over in the process, I lean back on my arms. 'How does one, after so many years, so many storms, winds, still stand tall and grounded? I wish I knew.'

"Mr. Uzumaki?" I turn to hear my name being called, but I'm alone among the trees. 'Who's-'

"Mr. Uzumaki, Sir?" Opening my eyes I see my to see my driver at my open door, must have drowsed off.

"Oh, sorry about that. I guess I dosed off a bit." I say sitting up and stretching whilst giving a long tiresome yawn. I blink my eyes a few times before I am more or less awake.

"We have arrived sir. When would you like me to pick you up?" the driver asks as he steps aside for me to get out.

"I'll give you a call 15 minutes in advance." I say to him as he closes the door.

With a curt bow, "Yes, will that be all Mr. Uzumaki?"

"Yes, you're dismissed." as he makes his way to the drivers door and I make my way to the entrance to the building. "One last thing," I say just as he opens his door he looks up to meet my eyes, "again Iruka, Its Naruto." I tell him politely with a smile and a small chuckle as I make my way into the building through the automatic doors. Waving to the receptionist she politely waves back as I make my way up to the elevator. My mother is up on the third floor. Pushing the button the elevator doors stay open for a few seconds before slowly closing and the elevator jumps and it starts its journey up. The numbers going by. 1, 2, 3 and a ding! The thick metal doors open and I make my way down the hall to the front desk. Walking up to the desk I cross my arms on the table and look at the receptionist, adamittedly typing at her keyboard as if I wasn't even here.

"Hello Naruto, how are you today? Here to see mom?" She says as she takes her eyes off her computer screen to meet mine and gives me a sweet smile.

"Yup!" I say enthusiastically, "Its a long overdue visit. Dads had me working my butt off this month so I haven't had any spare time. But! I have the day off today so I though I would give her a surprise visit! I may pay a visit to Granny after mom as well." I say, a big grin planted on my face.

She giggles at my enthusiasm. "Well shes where she always is. I'll be here as always, so let me know if you need anything, ok?"

"Gotcha! Thanks Shizune!" I say as I make my way room after room till I stop at room 26. Knocking a couple of times I hear the sound of papers being moved.

"Who is it?" the person says from inside.

"It's me." I say as I crack the door open enough for my head to squeeze through. Shes sitting at the desk in her room that looks out on a few neighborhoods and buildings. Turning around she catches my eyes. He beautiful long red hair is tied up in a messy bun while a few loose strands hang out to frame her creme face. Her dark blue eyes seem to sparkle from behind her thin rimmed glasses as she sees me. Standing up and brushing off her baggy white shirt thats been tied at the side to be more form-fitting and her dark grey sweatpants of eraser shards and makes her way over to me.

"Naruto! Its so great to see you!" She says as she comes over to me and gives me a big warm hug, "How have you been? I havent seen you in a while." She says as she releases me, "take a seat", she gestures to the chair next to her desk, the back of it facing the window.

"I have been swamped with work for the last month and haven't gotten much time off. But I had this weekend off so I thought that I would surprise you." I say with a smile.

She smiles back, "Your father really does work you too much. If you work too much it can really put a strain on you health wise."

"It's not so bad, I get my fair amount of days off. Plus the work he's having me in charge of is really important, like next week he wants me to sit in with him and the team on a merger." I say, with small about of nervousness apparent in my voice.

"See I told you, you do well in your work and you'll get the reward you deserve." She say's with a genuine smile that makes her eyes close. She's so beautiful, I never forget that. Every visit, shes the same as always. Caring, calming, nurturing. But, there's always something missing. "You haven't volunteered here in a while. Do you think you'll be able to? If only your fathers company didn't steal up all your time. You would be an amazing addition to the staff here, I have started a painting class. They say that art is the most therapeutic, I have always wanted to see if I could draw or paint. You want to see them?" she asks enthusiastically. She leaps from her seat at her desk and makes her way over to her bed and into the bedside table drawer. Its the first time shes gotten this excited about anything that have her do here. As she skips back she plops back in her desk chair giggling and clutching the sketchbook to her chest. "I am not an artist, hardly from one actually, no one else has seen these. Except for the art instructor. He says they're great, but his job is to be encouraging and to give you motivation, regardless of your talent" she mutter the last bit.

"I'm sure they are wonderful, would you like me to see them?" I ask carefully, having done this before. She sits there, the book still clutched to her chest, looking over to the desk as if in deep thought, with a curt nod she looks back and me and hands me the sketchbook. I slowly and gently take it from her hands. With one last glance at her eyes I look back down and the green cover and fold the spiral cover over to the first work of art. Its some basic sketches of things in her room. He bed, the desk, the pencil holder on it. Flipping through the first few pages are all practice sketches. Shading, contrast, prospective, shape, form, etc. Passing all the practice sketches I make it to her full drawings. They remind me a lot of Sasukes drawings. Thought the detail is more focused on the subject than the background. One is of an elderly man sitting in a chair that looks over the outdoor area of the building. The detail is on him, with the background lightly sketched in as well. It makes me think more and more of Sasukes drawings, she'd like him. I smile to myself and let out a content chuckle as I flip from page to page. Some are of landscapes from her window, others from different angles of the inside of her room. Most of them being detailed portraits of fellow people in the building.

"You like them?" her soft voice breaks me out of my thoughts and brings my eyes to meet her examining ones. As if looking through them to see any doubt in them. Finding none she noticeably relaxes.

"They're-," looking back down at them one last time, looking over the shadows and the details, "they're amazing." I say as I lift my head again to give her bright reassuring smile. "They remind me of a person I met recently. I met him two days ago, actually." I continue to look a the drawings with smile as the fond memory of Sasuke and I's meeting come back to me. It was the one good thing that had happened to me in a long while.

"A friend?" she says with intrigue.

"Yeah, he's an artist like you," I say as I gently put the sketchbook on her desk and return my hand to my lap, "you'd like him."

"You should bring him by next time you come. If he's kind like you, I know I'll like him. I mean it was your volunteer work her at this facility that brought you and I together. Those years ago."

"Yeah," I say with a long sigh, "that was a long time ago, Kushina, a long time." Looking up at her, "So how are you doing? or how do they say you're doing?" I ask letting my gaze fall to my hands, tapping at my thighs one at a time.

"They upped the dosage on, I can never remember the names of them, they're so long and complicated. All I know is that it doesn't make me feel good. They make me feel fuzzy.." she says with a frown. "but its making the loud voices go away, so I guess that's the good sign right." she says with a hopeful grin. I give a crooked smile back, not letting the small amount of sadness slip through my mask.

To take my mind off of it, "Did you have art today?"

"Yes, we started with watercolors! 'Finally some color!' I say to the instructor. "That reminds me! I have something for you!" She stands up as quickly as the thought popped into her head and she's back in her bedside drawer, searching through it, then moving to the drawer below the first. With a 'Hazah!' she scrambles back to her chair at her desk like an energetic teenager. It's great to see her with so much enthusiasm. Its like seeing the real her again, before the quiet started to devour her, in a sense. She was so withdrawn, so fidgety, anxious and paranoid. "Here it is!" they thoughts of the past are put on hold as she hands me a piece of acrylic paper with a person sketched upon it and with light colors illuminating the figure.

"It-, it's me." I stammer out.

"They said to draw what makes you happy, your happy place in a sense I guess." she crosses her legs to sit indian style in her chair whilst continuing, "and I thought of the sun, which then made me think of my favorite volunteer, you." she finishes with broad grin that makes her eyes wrinkle shut as she scratches that back of her neck, a habit of her nervousness. "D-Do you like it?" she inquires. I pull my vision that is mesmerized by the work of art in my hands.

"I love it, I'll frame it when I get home." I say with as much happiness that I can muster behinds the mask, it comes out surprisingly steady. Considering how my emotions are ripping my insides to shreds. It's taking all I can to muster the brightest smile and the tears away. "How long has it been now?"

"You volunteered for a summer under Tsunade. That was god, 5 years ago." She says as she reclines back in her chair. Its been longer I think to myself. I never say anything. The doctors advise against it.

"Yeah," the mask feels like its cracking, but looking up at her, she doesn't seem to see. Mustn't be noticeable, thank god. "I had did some volunteer work for extra credit for my of my classes. I was going into senior year, and my psychology class that I had signed up for required me to volunteer during said summer. I already knew Tsunade through my dad." I could feel the torrent of emotion inside me leaking slightly, as I released a shaky breath disguised it behind a yawn. "That's when I met you. I was assigned to you as a companion I guess whilst you did your scheduled activists. I shadowed you I guess you could say." I say with a chuckle. "It was a good experience." I say finally. We get into a comfortable line of conversation. Her attention shorting in many different directions but I've learned to keep up and alert. Mostly its about how she's been, what she's been up to, med changes. That sort of thing. During one of her stories theres a knock at the door. Both turning a young female nurse peeks her head through the door.

"Ms. Uzumaki you have your group session in 20 minutes, just wanted to give you a heads up" shes finishes with a smile.

"Oh, its it almost one already?" Shes says astonished as she looks up to check her clock on the wall to the left of her desk that reads 12:42pm. "I guess we'll have to cut the visit here. Im so sorry." she says as the nurse leaves, closing the door behind her.

"Really, its no problem. I came her as a surprise anyways!" I laugh it off as I carefully put her painting in the middle of one of the big books in my messenger bag so that it does get dents or folds. "I'll check your schedule when I visit Tsunade after I leave here." slinging my bag over my shoulder and standing up to leave she stands as well, to see me off as she always does. Putting both her hands on my upper arms she holds me there are looks up at me. Meeting my eyes she smiles, a genuine heartwarming smile. She raises one arm up to push my soft hair out of my face. Placing both hands on my cheeks she looks at me, as it shes having a sense of a fleeting memory.

Quietly she speaks, "I always have a feeling of deja vu when I see you. Like we've known each other in a past life or something." running her soft hand through my hair once more, "but, if I were to have a son, I would imagine him to be like you. Exactly like you, except maybe with red straight hair," she giggles out while giving my hair a light ruffle, "but blonde suits you. It suits your bright and warm personality." With that she gives me a small hug. "Until next time?" she asks releasing me, as I make my way to the door my hand grips the knob so tightly my knuckles turn white. Its all I can do to keep my cool. Then turning to face her I give he a sun glowing smile.

"Until next time." I say happily with my fake smile fully intact. Opening the door and closing it quietly. I stand outside the door, still, a roaring cloud of emotions looming over my head threatening to give way any moment. I make my way in a fast walk to Tsunades office. Her head office is at the end of the hall and to the left and the first door on my right with 'Tsunade Senju' on a plaque on the door. Giving three quiet taps with a pause or two in between, that would go unnoticed, but she heard them. Hearing a chair move and footsteps coming up to the door is opened but a busty blonde women who looks about to yell at whoever it was that disturbed her. Looking at the mop of sun blonde hair that won't look at anything but the tiled floor beneath his feet. 'Shit', she thinks to herself. She moves aside enough for me to pass by her and into her office. She quietly closes the door behind her and locks it. I can feel her footsteps come up to me, she puts her hand softly on my shoulder. Quicker that I know it, I'm hugging her will all the strenght I can muster as I release sob after heart wrenching sob into her blouse.

"Shh, I've got you, I've got you." shes says quietly to me, laying her cheek on the top of my head running a hand through my hair and the other rubbing soothing circles into my back.

"W-Why?" I choke out through my thick sobbs, "Why? It's not fair." I chant into her chest. As the tears continue to flood my eyes.

"I wish I knew. But, shes here. Maybe not all of her, but her nonetheless." shes says reassuringly into my hair giving it small kisses as she nuzzles me closer.

* * *

Kushina Uzumaki is my mother. She doesn't know that though. She was diagnosed with Schizophrenia when she was about 23. It had started getting really hard when I was 11, thats when dad had her hospitalized. She would hallucinate and talk about voices telling her to do things, things she didn't want to do. Very bad things. Over the years it gradually got worse. It had a great effect on the hippocampus section of her brain, which hold her memories. It was a sort of retrograde amnesia. She doesn't remember any of us. That happened when I was 14, I went into visit her once and found out the hard way.

"Hello mom, how are you feeling?" I ask her as I stop at the end of her bed. A doctor off to the side to monitor the interaction. But, she didn't recognize me. I remember looking into her eyes, praying, praying that what the doctors had told be before entering the room weren't true, but there was genuine confusion in her eyes, not a single glint or anything that would suggest she had the faintest idea who I was. They were right.

"I'm sorry, you must have me mixed up with someone else." she said as if she would to someone she genuinely had no recollection of them. To say I didn't take it well, would have been a tremendous understatement. The doctors had tried to explain to her that I was her son. For a while she held the same face I did, as if praying this wasn't happening. But then. She froze. She looked as if she was about to be sick, putting her head in her hands, saying things. As if yelling with someone that was whispering in her ears under her breath. All I remember at that point was being pulled out of the room by a nurse while Tsunade the head physician of this ward and the others went in to sedate her. It was terrifying. I guess I was in shock because I just remember being pulled into Tsunades arms as she came out of my mothers room. And started doing exactly what she is now. Myself in her arms sobbing while the throat hurt and my gut muscles cramped while mumbling to herself, 'Shit, that shouldn't have happened to you. Christ.' Rubbing circles into my back as she mutters over and over how she should have foreseen this and prevented it. How I didn't deserve to find out like that or to have this happen to me at all. We both stood there in the hall, a few doors away from my mother, whilst clinging to her as if she would slip away the second I started to let go. She had had a severe manic episode, brought on by, well, me. The only things to be heard were the sounds of faint foot steps and my convulsive gasps in the long hallway.

* * *

**_AGAIN! so far the response has been great! I love that you guys like it so far! Again! Feedback is the best thing for me right now! review review! _**

**_And thank you so very much for all the support thus far._**

**_((* Sarah Kay - Ted Talk "where I got a lot of my inspiration.))_**

**_Songs in this chapter: 'Do I Wanna Know' - The Arctic Monkeys & 'Down the Road' - C2C _**


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